The pain wakes me from a deep sleep. It is the worst pain I can ever remember experiencing. My eyes flood with tears, but I cannot open them. The tears stream down my face like a flash flood. My eyes are clenched shut but the tears escape. The pain continues without letup. I feel for the box of tissues on my nightstand and blot what I can, tissue after tissue. I flail and toss and turn without purpose. After some time, the pain is lessened, just slightly, but enough to give me a glimmer of hope.
Hours later, the pain is mostly gone. I can open my eyes but everything is very blurry – much blurrier than my normal blurry. My eyes are now hypersensitive to light. I cannot be outdoors, I cannot look at a computer screen, I cannot tolerate a glowing light bulb. And so I wait.
By evening, probably 12 hours from the start of the episode, my eyes seem back to normal, normal for me. I can finally resume my activities.
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That was the first time I experienced a dry eye attack. Since then, I have taken steps to try and avoid such events, but still they occur, a little less intense – just a few a year. JUST a few a year!
I have described these episodes to several ophthalmologists and even more optometrists, as well as other eye care specialists. Sometimes my messages never even reach a doctor. Most listen and shrug. They have no advice, no recommendations.
Once I said to an eye doctor, “it feels like the top layer of my eyeball is being ripped off,” and she responded, “yes, that is exactly what is happening.” She told me the medical term for what was happening. That was the end of our discussion.
Not all dry eye sufferers experience what I do. Some people experience itchiness, redness, blurry vision. Symptoms and their severity vary.
So here are 5 things I do to try to help myself:
Avoid looking at devices before bedtime.
Blink intentionally and frequently.
Use over-the-counter artificial tears.
Apply warm compresses to closed eyelids.
Gently massage the closed eyelid.
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Do you have a dry eye story to tell or home remedy to share?
I received a message from a reader, Eyal, about the development of an app for android phones called Speak. Eyal states that this app is different because it is totally free, no purchase required, no subscription required.
I developed an app for Android only. There is currently no version for Apple.
It reads text caught on camera, identifies products by reading barcodes and detects objects and colors. It also reads pdf files and text from images stored on the device, and translates text.
The app is quite similar to Envision AI, if you know it, the main difference and my main incentive was to provide a free app. Envision AI costs 5$ a month, the subscription fee is completely justified since they use cloud services which are not free. I did the best I could with free technology for the benefit of those who cannot afford the cost.
Please take a look (if you have an Android phone) the link is below.
You don’t have to be blind or visually impaired to experience panic, but it helps.
For me, there are 4 things that cause me to experience panic.
Pictured: The inside of a crowded New York City subway car. All seats are taken and there is standing room only.
1. Crowds. I do not mind crowds in a mall or at a concert. I do not mind crowds at the beach or in a packed subway car. I do, however, mind crowds greater than 5 or 6 people where I am expected to know at least some of the people.
I cannot see who is there or who is where. When I enter a room, I cannot assess the space and know whom to approach. I know these people. I belong there. But who is here? I have been known to strike up a conversation with a lamp, ask a mannequin for directions to a bathroom, and greet a golden retriever that was impulsively snatching food from a table. So I wait for someone to notice me, to greet me, and if that does not happen, I am overwhelmed with not knowing what to do and where to go.
I have avoided family gatherings most of my life. I did not attend my high school graduation, or my college graduation, I have declined invitations to weddings. My own wedding was limited to just 10 people including me, the groom, and a five-month-old baby; any more would have ruined my special day.
Pictured: A white smoke detector hung on a ceiling just waiting to sound its ear-piercing alarm.
2. Smoke detectors. I do not know why smoke detectors upset me so. We lived in a small apartment in Portland, Oregon, and there were 3 smoke detectors in our small place. Normal cooking set off all three smoke detectors – frequently. They were ear-piecing! I tried so hard to avoid anything that would set them off, but sometimes just the toaster would do it. Cooking makes my heart pound.
We moved three years ago. There is only one smoke detector in our current apartment. The first time I used my oven, the smoke detector went off. I have not used my oven since.
Pictured: A pre-schooler on a scooter. He is protected with helmet and elbow guards. When he is around, I need those protections too, and more!
3. Kids on scooters. Little kids on scooters scare me most. They roll themselves along the sidewalk at a faster pace than they can handle. They cannot steer to avoid objects in their way, including people. The parents or guardians are often far in the distance, sometimes calling to the seemingly deaf wee ones. These kids are essentially untethered and unattended. When they are headed straight at me, I usually do not know until they are near enough that I feel the air movement they generate. They do not comprehend the meaning of a white cane; they do not understand that their path is not automatically cleared for them. I have redirected quite a few of these speeding demons with my hand or body just in the nick of time, or not. I am afraid those little speed demons just might kill me one day!
Pictured: A public restroom with a lineup of sinks opposite a row of stalls.
4. Public Bathrooms. Public bathrooms drive me crazy – even without considering all the germs. First, they have to be found. Just ask. It’s over there, wherever there is! Too many are too dirty and I flat out reject them, immediately. But the nice ones – the ones that are clean and tidy and everything appears to be in the right place, best I can tell, – those are the ones that too often baffle me. I hate the ones with automatic flushes that flush before I am ready. Then there are the ones with delayed mechanisms to get the flush going. After waiting long enough to feel like nothing is going to happen, I start looking for the flush handle or the button or the pedal or something. Then on to the sink. Where are the faucets? I wave my hands here and there and if I am lucky, a measured amount of water appears, but my timing is off and I missed it. So I try again. Look for the soap. I do not think I even once have succeeded in getting the soap dispenser to dispense. Then on to the hand drier. Sometimes I pull a cloth towel through a machine; sometimes it turns out to be an empty paper towel dispenser. Sometimes I place my hands in a magical place and hot air loudly gushes forth. And sometimes I wave my wet hands here and there and nothing more happens.
1. Good lighting. Everything starts with good lighting. Use room lighting, spot lighting, and even motion sensor lighting in dark areas, like inside cabinets.
Pictured: Motion sensor LED light. The light comes on when the door is opened and stays lit for about 60 seconds, longer if more motion is detected. Rechargeable, and requires charging about once a month with average use.
2. Food Prep Tray. Place cutting board, utensils, and foods on a food prep tray, a tray with a lip around it. You will spend less time searching the floor for things that bounced, rolled, or fell.
Pictured: Orange plastic tray with lip around edges sits on countertop. On the tray are knife and fork, spices including salt, garlic, and paprika, 3 whole eggs and a stainless steel mixing bowl.
3. Stainless steel drinking cups. Instead of glasses that are easily tipped over and too often shatter, use stainless steel drinking cups. They are just a little more expensive up front but last and last without needing replacement, so quite cost effective in the long run. As an added bonus, they keep cold drinks naturally colder.
4. Two-sided cutting board. A cutting board with a black side and a white side provides contrast. Use the side that has the most contrast with the food you are cutting or chopping or dicing or slicing.
Pictured: An admittedly difficult-to-see 2-sided cutting board. The white side is shown. The black side is face down.
5. Sauce pans. Sauce pans contain food and spatter better than fry pans. The end result will be the same, but less food will slip, slide, or spatter over the sides.
Pictured: Sauce pan on stovetop containing a large slotted spoon for stirring, and the ingredients for “Thunder & Lightning.”
6. Oven-cooked bacon. Lay strips of bacon in a single layer on the bottom of a roasting pan. Place in a 400-degree oven for 22 minutes. Perfect bacon every time – and without the hot grease spatter. Google will suggest you use a cookie sheet. No! That hot grease will splash about when you remove the tray from the oven. Use a roasting pan. It is deeper and will contain the grease better. Trust me on this one!
Pictured: Cooked bacon on baking sheet fresh out of the oven.
7. Mandoline. Keep your fingers safe from sharp blades by slicing with a mandoline. Not only will your fingers and fingernails stay protected, but you will end up with uniform slices of fruits and vegetables, and more.
Pictured: A mandoline for safe and uniform slicing and its food holder. The food holder has a large knob for holding the food firmly in place for slicing.
8. Spice jar labels. Index cards (cut to fit) with spice names written with bold markers can be wrapped around spice jars and secured with a rubber band. See blog post “Spice Things Up” for details.
Pictured: 3 spice jars boldly labeled for curry, cinnamon, and cumin. Rubber bands hold the labels in place.
9. Bump dots. Place bump dots on microwave and oven and other appliance buttons to easily identify the location of buttons you use frequently. This ensures that you will consistently press the desired button, and you will also do so in less time. Bump dots are available in many sizes, shapes, and colors. If you know any people who are blind or visually impaired, odds are they have bump dots to spare. You only need a few.
Pictured: Assorted bump dots including flat felt dots, round cork dots, raised round orange dots, raised black round and square dots, and clear round raised dots. Many other sizes, shapes and colors are also available.
10. Spice ladles. Spice ladles can be dipped easily into spice jars and other condiments for removal of just the right amount. Avoid spills and waste. See blog post “4-Inch Ladles” for details.
Pictured: A jar of paprika with 3 spice ladles, a soup ladle, and a teaspoon.
11. Double spatula. A double spatula makes turning pancakes, french toast, hamburgers, and more, an easy task.
Pictured: A double spatula – 2 spatulas with a nonstick finish that are connected in order to work together as tongs or flippers.
12. Silicone trivets. Multi-purpose silicone trivets, typically 8-inches in diameter, can be used as hot pads, potholders, coasters, and more. They can easily be trimmed, if desired. Because of their nonslip properties, I find them most beneficial as nonslip pads for mixing bowls, hot pots, serving bowls, cups, etc.
Pictured: An 8-inch diameter silicon trivet that has been trimmed to 5 inches. The cutaway ring can be used under mixing bowls, etc., to prevent slippage.
Bonus
Your personal assistant – Alexa, Cortana, Siri, etc. Ask your personal assistant to set a timer for you, read a recipe, or suggest substitute ingredients.
Pictured: An iPhone. Siri ha set the timer and it is displayed.
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Links of products and information related to the above blog post. Note that the links showing items for purchase are for information only and are not specifically endorsed.
The following list of novels features characters who are blind or visually impaired. All of these books stand out as great reads and are recommended. This list is a work in progress. Additional books featuring characters who are blind or visually impaired will added to this list as they become known. This page can be accessed at any time under the BOOKS tab at the top of this and every page on this blog.
Click on a hyperlink if you are interested in reading my review.
Pictured: Gray floppy sun hat and gray sneakers. Ready for summer.
I have a love-hate relationship with the sun.
The sun warms my heart and my soul. It is also painful to my eyes. I love a sunny day; the sunshine lifts my spirits. I hate a sunny day; the sunshine whites out my vision and I see nothing, my eyes tear, and I feel pain.
I have tried all kinds of sunglasses: prescription sunglasses (very expensive), wraparound sunglasses that go over eyeglasses (very bulky), and flip-ups that don’t – don’t flip up enough and out of the way, that is. I have tried various tints – dark green, mirror, gray, blue, brown, and yellow – all of which have benefits in direct sun, but when I step under the shade of a tree, my vision is reduced to seeing nothing.
I had mobility training last summer. I learned a lot from this wonderful teacher. Best of all, she suggested I try a hat.
So, hats I tried. I started with sun visors. Then I tried brimmed sports caps. Both styles did block the sun and let light in for shade, but those looked – let’s just say odd, not me at all. So next I tried floppy sun hats. Yes!
Floppy hats work for me. I found one that rolls up to carry in my purse, and unrolls beautifully when needed. It blocks the sun yet lets in the light. It even matches my shoes!
Hats off to Karen, my mobility instructor. Hats on to summer sun!
Pictured: The author, Renee, outdoors on a sunny day, wearing floppy gray sun hat.
Do you see what I see? Can you see what you can’t see? What is it, and how do you know?
Assistive devices for vision impairment can be very helpful, and very expensive. CCTVs, braille writers, magnifiers, and audiobook players cost hundreds, even thousands of dollars, to name just a few things that could help blind and visually impaired people. Even audiobooks can be beyond our budget. Too often, even tools that can help us with our daily activities and special needs are not even made available for us to try, or even know about. And then, can we afford them? We must rely on word of mouth, and even then the results can be disappointing. It is not like I see what you see, or that you see what someone else sees. With vision impairment, we all see (or don’t see) the same things differently.
Talking about different devices can often lead to success. Even better, there are so many common household items and stationery supplies, and even things we never gave much thought to that provide so much benefit. Sometimes we just have to think outside the box.
For example, did you know you can cook perfect bacon in the oven instead of a fry pan and avoid all the hot oil spatter? Did you know a child’s whiteboard can be the perfect tool for your notes and reminders? Did you know you can easily connect your tablet to your computer screen or TV so you can benefit from greatly enlarged print and images? Did you know there is an online group that gives away used audiobooks and braille books, magnifiers, and more?
We have a lot to talk about. So let’s explore together.
Legally Blind 